Avril's blog on what's new from the world of healthy ageing

My Classic FM Romance internet dating hell - did I pop into Broadmoor by mistake?

By Editor on April 4, 2013 8:05 PM | 1 Comment | No TrackBacks

Would you ever think of popping into the secure unit of a class A mental hospital for a blind date? No I thought not! Well I recently popped onto the Classic FM Romance internet dating site but unfortunately it appears to be almost the same thing.

I did blind dates years ago - when the only place you could find possible companions was in the classified adverts of quality newspapers like The Times or the satirical magazine Private Eye.

I was very young and slim and I was warned about my personal safety by friends who thought anyone doing that sort of thing, especially men were at the very best weird and the worst social misfits.

I discovered then that many were just that - plain misfits and others were sexual preditators with predilections they could not satisfy within normal relationships. The majority also had personality bypasses and plain bad manners.

A few years later I wrote about it for an international newspaper. A colleague did it in Rome, one in Madrid, another in Paris and of course I did it more than all of them put together in London - joining upmarket agencies and dinner dates. I recall one date where a man turned up in El Vinos wine bar not far from my office wearing a crumpled shirt with curled up frayed shirt collars and a dirty carrier bag which he spent most of the time rustling around in. At the dinner dates likewise I attracted the creeps which was most of the men who turned up. The women on the other hand were mostly pretty or attractive, witty and intelligent.

So I now I try and give fate a nudge again in 2012 with friends telling me that it has all changed and that it's a numbers game now and eventually I will meet someone decent.

But I am still not convinced. Talk about kissing frogs - more like toads. I see very good looking men in their 40s, divorced in good jobs in the City and we have a good two way dialogue unti I ask one why he needs to go online, and why I assume in particular if he is articulate? And surely if its just for easy encounters, one night stands and sex why don't they just go to a bar or one of those other sites. I get no answer from this particular man so I assume the worst and he couldn't truthfully answer me.

So by the time you have ruled out players and married men (after sex), sex addicts (more serious), commitment-phobes, men who live with their mothers in their 30s, 40s, and 50s until they die, desperados, mental illness sufferers, general weirdos, boring people, men over 50 who seem to have lost all attention to their personal care, and the hideously ugly toads - there is not a lot left..honestly trust me.

And its not just about looks is it? So you read profiles where the writing is almost illiterate or someone pours out all their dirty washing about divorce and marital disharmony, death and widow-dom...and men looking for Mother Teresa (don't they realise that she is dead?) ughhhh.

So I will be sharing my experiences here. By the way I put up a photo - that is not photo-shopped - am honest about my weight - but like most woman not about my age - on the grounds that if you met someone in 'normal' circumstances they wouldn't know your age either. Although at one point I did say I was 99 because I couldn't be older as Classic FM Romance doesn't seem to allow 100 year-olds - which I pointed out must be age discrimination.

Some of my encounters have been highly amusing. And I have hard funny stories from men too - especially about really big ladies or ladies that have really fibbed about their age with no realistic prospect of being believed! And the Cornish fisherman who got spammed with Viagra ads after he told women he couldn't see them currently because he was still sharing his home with his ex-wife because he couldn't sell it.

But I do wonder what happens to the majority of people once they have come out of the womb, and who make it to adulthood but have become totally emotionally dysfunctional on the way?

First of all I chose ClassicFM because I thought (mistakenly) it would attract like-minded people interested in - hmm - yes classical music and opera. But no it's actually what I would describe as a kind of aggregator for all the sites that appear to be on media outlets - so you actually get people from Saga, Kindred Spirits (Daily Telegraph) et al. Luckily we are spared illicit whats-it-called and fbuddies at least in name but not in spirit?

I've always thought that any man with an ounce of character would be able to strike up a conversation with a woman he thought might be interesting and not be online - and I haven't changed my view on that. It's a waste of time and I would end up in Broadmoor if I took this seriously wouldn't I? But if you have some stories to share let me know...

Internet romance - would you date a polecat, a decadent Duke or a drug-raddled poet?

By Editor on April 3, 2013 12:21 PM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

Internet dating functions, for those of you who have never done it, by each participant creating a name (nickname) for themselves, plus a strap line - which I assume is meant to embrace some positive and/or interesting component of their character and other stuff about themselves to attract prospective suiters. And also what they would like to see in a mate. Really it's a personal advert for yourself.

I would like to see a psychologist's take (more drilled down analysis) on some of these names and profiles to see what they really reveal between-the-lines about personality and mental makeup! That perhaps is the secret to successful internet dating - to interpret what people are really saying about themselves and what they want in relationships?

For instance, a lot of men online seem to think its attractive to use the following strap line: "Mad, bad and dangerous to know" which was used by Lady Caroline Lamb, the British aristocrat, in the 17th century to the poet, Lord Byron with whom she had an affair.

Well that relationship didn't end well - since Lady Caroline was married and it was a public scandal at the time and secondly she got spurned by Lord Byron whom she went on to stalk - as much as you could by stage coach and snail mail in the 1700s..

She famously sent him a book with "Remember Me!" written on the cover fly and he responded: "Remember thee! Remember thee! Till Dethe quench life's burning stream; Remorse and shame shall cling to thee, And haunt thee like a feverish dream! Remember thee! Ay, doubt it not. Thy husband too shall think of thee! By neither shalt thou be forgot, Thou false to him, thou fiend to me!"

Now Byron who died aged 36 was 'celebrated' for his aristocratic excesses (presumably only by other men) which included huge debts, numerous love affairs, rumours of a scandalous incestuous liaison with his half-sister as well as drugs. Nice man, not.

Lady Caroline also came to a bad end. She separated from her husband and she ended up living...at Brocket Hall (you may recall the last Lord Brocket was jailed for insurance fraud after dumping his luxury cars in a nearby lake and his wife going bananas while she was married to him and that was in this century!) near Welwyn in Hertfordshire.

She - Lady Caroline - became increasingly mentally unstable, complicated by alcohol abuse and the use of the drug laudanum. And eventually died aged only 42!

On Classic FM Romance there are several men with this strap line and even the name Byron - so what are they trying to say about themselves? By the way one of his most famous poems was Don Juan ...

So what are these men really thinking of? I suspect what they are really saying is what they want is unadulterated and unfettered sex with whoever passes by on the internet! Ah so it is a numbers game but then but not the kind most women are suspecting.

Or could it be they are ignorant of what Byron did and symbolised?

Well looking more closely at their profiles - one of them is a married man (identified by 'ask me later' on the question of relationship status) and the other just wants flings. So it can be all in a name, can't it? It can't be that they are hoping for a nice romantic outcome with any of the women they meet can it?

Internet dating also works by the individual trawling through the profiles and spotting others they are interested in and making them favourites - the favourite then receives an email to say someone has made them a fan. Then you can return the compliment and make them a favourite and in theory if you are interested start an email dialogue with them.

But getting a fan is, more often than not, a very big let down. You come home from a fun evening with your girlfriends to look through your emails and see that someone called, of all things "Polecat" has made you a fan. So you think to yourself - or is it just me "Polecat - what sort of name is that? Is it some sort of stinky animal with bad habits?" At least that 's my first reaction.

So what is a polecat and why should a woman go out with a male human polecat? Or someone whose imagination leads them to call themselves that? Added to which he did have a picture that looked - like a hairless ..hmm polecat!

Well there was a naval frigate in the 17th century called HMS Polecat but it appears to have been scuppered off the coast of Virginia by the French in 1782.

A real polecat pictured above

The name also applies to several types of carnivorous little animals from the WEASEL family found in Europe and the southern US - Tennessee and South Carolina. The word comes from pole (from the French word hen) and cat. In essence this means in Europe, a fondness for poultry. So then it's an animal that likes breaking into hen houses and killing all the hens. In the US its the name for a skunk - that's definitely smelly. There is also a 1980s rock band called the Polecats - they were probably very smelly too!

As a complete aside, I recall being a reporter on a local newspaper and being sent to a pub opposite Welwyn North station (not Welwyn Garden City) in Hertfordshire where there was a 'ferret legging competition' - this involved men putting as many live ferrets as possible down their trousers which were strapped at the bottom. The winner was determined by who could keep the most down there for the longest. Are ferrets part of the weasel family - most probably? These days I would be able sue my newspaper for suffering some sort of trauma after watching such an event! There was also the lama...

I see another profile called Foscari - one of the most infamous Dodges (Dukes) of Venice during the 17th century when the Carnival was a six month sex orgy for the European aristocrats who flocked there! This so-called gentleman told me he was a senior and highly paid Civil Servant in Whitehall and that he would be very generous and there are bits of his email which are 'X' rated - which does make you wonder about Civil Servants, doesn't it?

But even the most seemingly courteous names can be totally discourteous. Take another example Courtly Love - to a woman this might mean a romantic, chivalrous knight from the days of King Arthur fighting for the love and affection of a lady. But no - what that really means is that a the Knight can take what he pleases when he pleases, from as many as he pleases - read about it here http://www.middle-ages.org.uk/courtly-love.htm.

And someone who called themselves "All the Best Names are Gone" - the least said the better!

I called myself Donna Dolce - which in Italian means Sweet Woman - so even if you have only read Italian menus you would know that Dolce meant sweet or at worst dessert. But most men would message me as the name 'Donna' - they thought that was my name and one I have never liked in its plain English translation. So that one went over most of their heads!

Internet dating: the curse of the mummy's boy and why you should run from Norman!

By Editor on April 2, 2013 10:58 AM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

How to identify them..well the BIG, BIG warning sign is SINGLE and 50 but in reality if he is 30+ it may already too late! And there are lots of these men on the internet dating sites - just don't be fooled by the word 'single' because what it really means is emotionally unavailable for any real relationships.

The good news which should make you feel a whole lot better: a top psychologist tells me that even Angelina Jolie would get the same treatment!

These guys may sometimes be handsome and charming (not always as they do come in many guises) and they may have respectable jobs such as barristers and accountants - which is why they are so plausible because they can say they are working long hours - when they are really with mummy! They are also very clever at hiding their tracks - and may have their own home which of course they never or rarely live in.

But its a clever subterfuge - because they can tell you they live there and tell mummy that is where they have gone when they visit you on those rare occasions. They may even be registered there as a voter and have their favourite CD collection there - but that doesn't mean they live there!

In reality they hate woman because of the resentment of the emotional enmeshment with mummy that they don't have the guts to break. Many serial killers have been mummy's boys - Jeffrey Dahmer for one. I know it was a film but Norman lived with Norma's corpse at Bates Motel...

But these are men who cannot be turned. Mummy has spent years patting their little heads and telling them what wonderful and clever little boys they are, making them their favourite teas and washing and ironing their clothes for them. So they are mummy's special little boy and no-one else's.

It's a kind of emotional incest where mummy has groomed her little boy for years so he can only be happy if he makes her happy.

I recently received a telephone call from a girlfriend about one of my exs from many years ago (I'm too embarrassed to say how long ago). She said that this particular man who is now in his 60s, who lived and worked with his mother, and never married despite having numerous girlfriends - had recently disappeared without trace along with his mother - and she was worried about them.Their business has gone into liquidation and their landlands are not working. Very scary....

So I responded thus, that his mother who must be in her late 80s had probably died, and he was living with the dead body. My friend got a bit angry with me and said I had been watching too many episodes of the US crime forensic programme Crime Scene Investigation.

Norma in Psycho

But she is very wrong. As a journalist I have sat in several inquests where one half of a couple - and that is what these incestuous relationships are - has died and the husband or wife has refused to accept the death and lived with the decomp body for weeks and slept with it in the same bed...so I wait to hear because nobody can trace this bloke and his mother.

Still I am fascinated by this bond. But experts warn that is a very serious mental health condition and not easily broken. I do wonder what mummy's boy's and their mummy's do together for so long...but not enough to buy self-help books and waste my time and money. And there are a lot of people making money from vulnerable women who mistakenly believe that these situations are all their fault.

And if it helps, I have this analogy whenever I am even tempted to believe anything these guys say: If I was called to explain my behaviour by a judge in a court of a law and he/she said to me: "Well Miss O'Connor. This is the evidence: "This man is 50 years old and he has never been married or lived with a woman other than his mother. So what is it you thought you could do that other women before you were unable to do?"

I am afraid for once in my life I would be lost for words. I would also look very stupid. So the best advice is don't even go there you won't win and may waste months and years of your life! They won't hang around because they know when they've been found out and there is always another gullible woman to lure in and lie to for a few months....

Depression - is there a global epidemic?

By Editor on April 2, 2013 10:25 AM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

Depression is a common mental disorder. Globally, more than 350 million people of all ages suffer from depression, according to statistics from the World Health Organisation.

And here are more facts:

Depression is the leading cause of disability worldwide, and is a major contributor to the global burden of disease
More women are affected by depression than men
At its worst, depression can lead to suicide
There are effective treatments for depression
Depression affects 1 in five older people living within our community - that is people we see everyday around us.

Dr Catherine Hood (pictured), an expert in psychosexual medicine at St Georges Hospital in London, tells me about more research that has been carried out by the herbal medical experts at Kira.

Apparently millions of people in the UK are battling depression and low mood alone because they fear the social stigma surrounding the condition. And I can understand why many people would not want to tell their doctor because it can have a potentially negative effect on careers and even health insurance.

Aside from the serious kinds of depression, most of us feel down in the dumps from time to time. Especially with the winter weather and the depressed economy. But most of the time the reason is very close to home. Kira discovered the following reasons for feeling down:

· Forty per cent said their low mood was caused by work-related stress.

· A third (35%) said it was down to their personal life

· One in five blamed family reasons

· One in five said it was triggered by a specific event

· Nearly one in five felt down or miserable without knowing why

Of course there are proven mood boosters such as exercise, yoga and meditation but sometimes we can be overwhelmed by a bad situation, even if its only temporary. So what else can you do?

Nutritionists tell us that there are foods that help our body produce the feel-good-hormone serotonin - and one of those foods is turkey. But I suspect that we would have to eat a hell of a lot! Then are are vitamins and minerals which are helpful - folic acid, the Bs 12,6, 1 and 2, vitamin C and potassium.

And some people find St John's Wort (Hypericum perforatum) helpful. In Germany its covered by health insurance and some 20 million people there take it for depression. Various Clinical trials have shown that this plant extract works by prolonging the action of serotonin in the brain.

Dr Hood says it is not currently fully understood how this works - but it must be better than suffering in silence.

Kira LowMood Relief is a traditional herbal medicine for the relief of symptoms of slightly low mood and mild anxiety. (Available at Boots and pharmacies nationwide, RRP £15.99.);

A change is as good a rest - especially where exercise is concerned

By Editor on March 15, 2013 7:55 PM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

In pursuit of the body beautiful I go to visit fitness guru Melissa Crosby at the Kinesis Studios just off Ladbrooke Grove in London

In her light airy studio she has all kinds of interesting fitness devices which are used to combine Pilates, Gyrotonic, Yoga and general fitness for an 'inter-displinary' approach to keeping in shape.

The lovely Melissa (pictured above) believes that movement should feel good. So I take her at her word and sample a Gyrotonic class.I seem to recall reading that Madonna does this - but she probably has the whole kit at home.

Now Gyrotonic uses high-quality solid wooden benches and other paraphernalia, equipped with pulleys to support movement. It's all about specific and smooth movements to stretch and unknot muscles and joints. I can see the rationale for this kind of exercise and the next day I feel it too particularly in my buttocks.

Melissa takes our class - there are only three of us since the instructors pay great attention to ensuring that everyone gets it right and that you don't hurt yourself doing it!

Gyrotonic teaches movement that stretches and elongates the body- above

The way Melissa encourages you to work is entirely different from most forms of exercise I have experienced which are usually about cardio and calorie burning.

At Kinesis its more about taking a combined approach so you get to do a variety of things that target the problem areas (tums and bums) of the body such as Pilates.

And its not so easy even though you don't work up a sweat when you are trying to turn both arms in a circle without moving the rest of your body.

You can try a lesson for free - more here athttp://www.kinesis-studios.com www.kinesis-studios.com

Exercise in your own gym - join InstructorLive and do your classes 'on demand'!

By Editor on February 21, 2013 1:24 PM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

The secret of exercising successfully is to do what you enjoy doing. Then you will keep it up. And it's important to try different things so that your muscles are continually being challenged.

And if like me you are gym adverse or lead a hectic lifestyle then this is a convenient way of exercising which doesn't cost the earth - only £5.99 per month and no contract. So far I have tried the Barre class - it was easy to follow and you didn't need any special equipment only a chair in your living room.

So here is everything you need to know followed by an explanatory video - have fun:

InstructorLive - this is what you see on screen and to the left the live chat with questions from fellow exercisers

What is InstructorLive? InstructiveLive broadcasts live, interactive fitness classes over the internet. Subscribers pay £5.99 per month for access to over 40 live classes per month and unlimited access to an archive of on-demand classes. All classes are led by experienced instructors. There is no contract so the subscriber can stop their subscription at any time.

How do the live classes work? Participants (subscribers) can see and hear the instructor. They cannot see other participants and the instructor cannot see them. The participants can ask the instructor questions or chat with one another through a live messaging service on the screen. The instructors provide live feedback and motivation in response to the participants' questions. As classes are live and interactive they are different every time. All of the classes have been developed for this format and the instructors chosen for their ability to simply explain how to do the exercises. Each class lasts between 30 and 60 minutes and none of them requires any exercise equipment more sophisticated than a kitchen chair.

What is the on-demand archive? For those days when the class you want to do isn't being run live when you want to do it, InstructorLive provides subscribers with unlimited access to recordings of previous live classes meaning that they can work out when they want.

Free trial & Sign up Even though there is no contract anyone who wants to sign up to InstructiveLive automatically gets a one week free trial. Once the free trial is up participants will be invited to join. NB they can cancel their membership at any time with no penalty and no card details are required until the participant chooses to become a member.

Why can't the instructor see the subscribers? Research highlighted that many people don't want to be visible when they are exercising as they feel self-conscious or lack confidence. InstructiveLive therefore enables participants to see and hear the instructor though the instructor can't see or hear the participants and the participants can't see one another. Instead participants can ask the instructor questions by typing them into a "chat" panel on their screen.

How is InstructorLive sociable? Subscribers are notified when their friends are online and can use the panel to chat with each other as well as with the instructor creating a sociable and morally supportive atmosphere. Some attendees join sessions as much because they want to catch up with friends as for the health benefits. 

How InstructiveLive compares to other exercise classes

InstructorLive

1. No contract

2. £5.99/month

3. Body image irrelevant - nobody can see you so it doesn't matter how you look

4. Your schedule - if you miss a live class watch the recording at your leisure

5. Time efficient - you don't need to travel or change, great if you've got kids or a busy lifestyle

6. Instructors provide advice, encouragement & motivations

7. Class is different every time

Traditional Gym

1. Contract

2. Average £442/year or £36.83/month

3. A significant number of people are self-conscious about exercising in public

4. You're tied to the gym's schedule - classes are only available at scheduled times

5. Travel and change time can take a lot of time out of your day

Fitness Videos & Consoles

1. No contract

2. Cost of console or video

3. Classes are repetitive

4. No motivation, advice or encouragement from instructor

5. Lack of social element

Instructor Live Classes

• Barre Concept: Barre Concept combines Yoga and Pilates with the grace of Ballet. The result is a clearly visible change in body shape whilst improving posture and overall fitness.

• Fit Club: The 8th and final rule of Fit Club: If this is your first night at Fit Club, you HAVE to dance! Fit Club is only available LIVE. Thursdays at 7pm. Be there!

• Legs, Bums, and Tums: Get ready to tone up your legs, tighten your bum, and flatten your tum! This class focuses on those key areas of your body using specially designed exercises.

• Pyjama Pilates: There is something about being in our pyjamas that makes us feel good. Now feel even better by joining this class to help improve your posture, muscle tone and flexibility.

• Cellulite Dynamite: Fed up with unwanted lumps and bumps? It's time to focus on blasting off that stubborn cellulite! Don't be fooled, it can be done, and this class will show you how.

• La Bomba: With music provided by top latin DJ Jose Luis (La Bomba at Ministry of Sound), this dance fitness class will bring out the latin blood in everyone. Prepare to sweat!

• Yoga - Dynamic Flow: From advanced to those completely new to Yoga, this class has options for all levels. It will help you to a more lean, agile body, and a mind with a greater ability to 'let go' of your troubles.

• Yoga - Monks Method: Forget the stresses and strains of life with this unique yoga class. Based on developing good co-ordination and focus to help you refine, unwind and relax.

• Pre & Postnatal: For pre/postnatal women, this class will help you; prepare for labour, speed recovery, and give strength for carrying your baby whilst inevitably multi-tasking!

• Fusion Power Pilates: Combining a powerful workout with the elegant movements and music of ballet, this class has been created by Mao to specifically address core strength, balance, and body tone.

• Aerobics: There's a good reason Aerobics has been going strong for decades; It's a great workout and loads of fun! With music you'll want to sing along to, this class is suitable for all.  

What exerciser say:

"InstructorLive allows me to do classes from home, at my convenience, for an affordable price. I do classes in the morning before work, and love the archive of classes which is being constantly updated. Being able to ask the instructor questions live online gives the classes a nice interactive feel. The variety of classes is great, my favourite is the pyjama pilates as Sam is a fantastic teacher." Natalie, young professional.

"I love the convenience and do the yoga classes once a week." James  

"InstructorLive is easy to slot into my busy life and if I miss the live class I can do archive classes whenever. I use it two or three times a week." LBT & Aerobics regular  

"It's like going to classes at the gym but I can do the classes at home so don't have to leave my baby and at £6/month it costs the same as one Zumba class. Pyjama Pilates is paced exactly right for me - it's challenging without being impossible, and the instructor's guidance means I can be sure that I am doing it right. Great value for money." Andrea, new mum

InstructorLive Founder Luke Walter "We've spent the last six months trialling InstructorLive with a wide variety of test users. The feedback has been fantastic and has enabled us to develop a unique fitness experience for our members that is accessible, sociable, flexible, affordable and most importantly effective. With New Year's resolutions around the corner, InstructorLive provides a great value alternative to a gym membership. People will be able to slim their waistline without doing the same to their wallet."

The Inspiration for InstructorLive "My mum and sister have spent a lot of their lives struggling with their weight and have never felt like the kind of people who 'belong' in the gym. Discovering classes that they loved, pilates in my mum's case and Zumba in my sister's, completely changed them. They became more confident, self-assured and looked great too. It saddened me that it took them so long to get up the courage to venture into a group exercise environment. Justin and I set off to find a way for the millions of people, like my mum and sister, to be able to have that transformative fitness experience in complete privacy and from anywhere in the world. It just didn't make sense to us that fitness at home was still stuck in the dark ages of pre-recorded videos and DVDs, and such a solitary experience. It's been great for me too - I'd never have dreamt of doing pilates or yoga a year ago. All the great feedback is really exciting and encouraging. Our New Year's resolution is to be runninglive classes 24 hours a day by the end of the year."

The perverse joy of running - in snow, sleet and encountering jogger rage!

By Editor on February 10, 2013 6:10 PM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

Just before Christmas I decided that I needed to take more exercise. So do I rejoin a gym? My first thought is definitely not - the nearest is populated by guys who leave great huge pools of sweat on the floor next to the exercise bike and grunt and groan on the jogging machine - and the whole gym generally stinks...And the ladies are not blameless - there is hair in the sinks and showers and more - YUK! And I don't fancy using any one else's towel but mine from home thanks.

So the only way forward is to jog on the street? I used to run regularly and save money on gyms. Another plus is that it gets dark early so no one will see me while I am in the hobbling phase! On the negative jogging round Regents Park outer circle is fraught with all kinds of obstacles - giant tree roots that have raised the pavement and other joggers who are intent on going up your inner side no matter what! Hmm just like cyclists!!

Maybe it is any excuse not to? Then I had thoughts about those really brave people who took part in the Paralympics last year - all with disabilities and some without limbs who were managing to do a whole lot more than me. So I told myself to stop being pathetic and get out there.

On the first attempt I surprised myself by getting a third of the way round without even getting out of breath - I could have gone further but since there was no one to push me...then I walked and ran the rest of the three miles. Anyway, better to take it easy at my advanced age rather than do something silly and get an injury?

And so every other night I have been out there. Even in the snow and ice. And that surprised me because I don't like running in the cold - but I donned a hat and gloves and had some music and I was warm in no time. And I swear that when I got home I looked younger, glowing pink and my whole body felt great.

Co-incidental to this I receive a book in the post from ex-Navy fitness instructor Dave Concannon. His book, Little Dave's Big Fitness Plan, isn't so much about what exercise you should be doing as motivating you to do it in the first place. And as he quite rightly says: "Getting changed is the hardest part". And why does Dave call himself 'little' - well he's an unashamed 5'3" but that stopped him taking on Navy battleship commanders and getting them fit too! But some other words in the book ring in my ears - that you will get a high from being one of the very few people exercising especially when the weather is at its worst - as it recently has in the UK. And he is right!

I have been out in the snow and the ice and I confess that it was exhilarating - warmed up after 10 minutes and home in 30 glowing again.And the fact that drivers and others stared at me as if I was mad made it all the more fun!

I have now made it the whole way round, without aching legs or lungs - not bad considering I have a chest infection. And today I think the effort of breathing so hard has thrown off the germs.

Feeling optimistic after completing the 3-mile round the outer circle intermediate route I encounter 'jogger rage' while doing a walking reconnoitre for the six mile circuit inside the park. On the outer circle footpath which is very icy I walk towards the road to cross it but stop because of an oncoming car. Then I hear a very angry "oh for goodness sake'' - and I turn round to see a very unattractive big-bottomed woman slowly pounding away...Hmm she clearly would have preferred it had I been hit by the car...

I can't wait to feel the jogger's high - which I have had in the past - that's when you are not sure whether you may have died as you suddenly don't feel tired and could run forever!

Do buy a copy of Dave's book - it's only £9.99 at Amazon - well worth it for the exercise tips and also the Navy anecdotes! Little Dave's Big Fitness Plan: The hardest part is getting changed

And if you want to know more watch this video...

Boots & Specsavers et al - are they sponsoring the Liverpool Pathway too?

By Editor on February 8, 2013 12:35 PM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

It's very disconcerting to know that when you reach a certain age the mail that comes through your letter box is designed to make you feel as if you have suddenly acquired a whole host of diseases and that you already have 'one foot in the grave.'

Boots seem to be the most prolific. What a delight this week to receive a letter with "Boots hearing care" emblazoned across it. And 'Swap Snippets for the full story' - and what that is supposed to mean I have no idea! Underneath, still on the envelope is: 'How a free check can improve your hearing.'

Since I have had no signs of suddenly going deaf....and the letter inside continues "Life's more fun when you join in" Hmmm and I get 150 points on my Boots Advantage Card and one third of an invisible hearing aid - what joy I can't wait.

So when I saw another letter entitled: "More treats for over 60s" - I thought incontinence pads, chair lifts and worse. This was also from Boots informing me that as an older person I will get 10 points for every £1 I spend (its normally 4) - does this mean they hope I won't live long enough to claim them? Oh and 25% off complete glasses - so if I only have one eye I don't get it?

So I get two letters from Specsavers informing me I can have a free eye test. This is along with letters and texts to my mobile phone from equity release specialists and pension providers - very annoying.

So it seems I am in imminent danger of going deaf and my eye sight deteriorating - and that's only the tip of the iceberg...

Not to mention the bowel cancer kit, the mammogram ...oh and I notice I won't be able to be a blood donor after the age of 68 so best try and kick the bucket before then! Or if I end up in hospital better make sure I am not on the Liverpool Death Pathway or there is a "Do not Resuscitate notice in my file!

But not before I've jogged round the park and done my pressups! And thank goodness that the toyboy is not the postman!

Men take note: discover how to get rid of nose hair Aussie style

By Editor on December 19, 2012 10:58 AM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

For those of you who have read my earlier blogs on internet dating - you will know that I have unfortunately discovered that most men aged 50+ seem oblivious to the sprouting hair on their ears and from their nostrils - and possibly other darker places! I now discover that there is a virtually painless solution to this problem - and its been embraced Down Under literally! In this video you will see how Aussie's are tackling nostril hair - with a handy little waxing device called Nad's Nose Wax.

Nose hair removal first became popular in New York but this Aussie DIY version costs only £17.99 - buy at www.nads.com

Getting your orgasmic voice back with pelvic floor training

By Editor on November 28, 2012 4:15 PM | No Comments | No TrackBacks

On Friday I had an invitation to meet the lovely Stephanie Taylor (pictured below) who is MD of Kegel8, at the Richmond Literary Festival.

So I go along to see a performance by Funny Women, a group of female comedians whose aim is to give women a voice. And that is something that Stephanie is also championing. Her company Kegel8, is a specialist in pelvic floor exercisers - these are medical devices that help woman strengthen internal muscles responsible for urine continence and womb prolapse. And as an addiitonal bonus they are also helpful in strengthening the vaginal muscles for a more intense sexual experience. So in her way Stephanie is also helping woman get their voice - their orgasmic voice!

By way of this Kegal8 sponsored the evening. The Funny Women, Viv Groskop, Sarah Courtauld, Rowan Pelling, a City CEO trainer Julia Streets had us in stitches with their ironic take on the female condition. And also handy for budding comedy writers their tips for getting up on stage and performing - jokes not any other acts by the way!

The evening began with a panel discussion, led by Funny Women founder Lynne Parker, which started in the usual way - asking where the comediennes get their inspiration for comic writing? How do you fit writing into your schedule? - and ended with Comedy Writing Award winner Sarah Courtauld revealing her experiences of living with a religious cult. Newspaper journalist Rowan Pelling then divulged the tale of the time she stood on a cab driver in the middle of the street at one in the morning, apparently in aid of creating material for her writing...

Funny Women - picture by www.fightingfifty.co.uk

The audience also had a surprise gift from Stephanie in their gift bags, limited edition gold Kegel balls, which are used to test the strength and health of your pelvic floor muscles.

After the show - well the next day - I set out to explore the world of pelvic floor exercisers and discovered it is a BIG AND HOT ISSUE for ladies, particularly those who have had partial incontinence as a result of the trauma of childbirth. Then there are those who suffer stress incontinence when they cough or laugh - and that is no joke!

These things can only get worse with ageing so there's no time like the present to get your pelvic floor in shape.

Stephanie tells me that she was inspired to get into the business of selling pelvic floor exerciser through her work with Relate, the relationship organisation, where she was often told by women that they wanted sex with their partners but were not able to enjoy it because of weak vaginal muscles.

Well ladies, Elixir has good news. There is a new device about to go on sale - the Kegel8 Pelvic Floor Exerciser - an electronic device than can measure your pelvic floor fitness and encourages you to do daily exercises until you are in peak condition there. So watch this space for our review. yes...Yes...YES!!

Avril's blog on what's new from the world of healthy ageing

My Classic FM Romance internet dating hell - did I pop into Broadmoor by mistake?

Internet romance - would you date a polecat, a decadent Duke or a drug-raddled poet?

Internet dating: the curse of the mummy's boy and why you should run from Norman!

Depression - is there a global epidemic?

A change is as good a rest - especially where exercise is concerned

Exercise in your own gym - join InstructorLive and do your classes 'on demand'!

The perverse joy of running - in snow, sleet and encountering jogger rage!

Boots & Specsavers et al - are they sponsoring the Liverpool Pathway too?

Men take note: discover how to get rid of nose hair Aussie style

Getting your orgasmic voice back with pelvic floor training

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